pronoun misuse

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

We need to start with an inspiration, and then you need a plan. You also need a solid basis.

What’s wrong with it?

It’s not parallel, the subject of the first clause is "we," whereas the subject of the next two clauses is "you."

What the author means to say is that the reader needs inspiration, a plan, and a solid basis.

The problem is that the author uses more than one pronoun to refer to the reader.

How do you fix it?

Easy: Just replace "we" with "you."

Correct sentence:

You need to start with an inspiration, and then you need a plan. You also need a solid basis.

An even better sentence would be:

You need inspiration, then a plan, and then a solid basis.